I have compiled links to resources as I find them on

a Links Page


email enquiries to:

nathan@menopeningheartstojesus.com



1 in 6

 is a good resource which answers many questions in a helpful manner
the following page is onlt to be read by

ADULT male survivors over the age of 21.

If yes

scroll down


if no

please return to the homepage

......



Hetrosexual male survivors struggle with the fact that we
were subjected to a sexual experience - as unwanted
and uninvited as it was - by a male .

That a boy was sexually abused by a man says a lot about the
messed up mind and sexuality of the perpetrator
not the survivor.

It is psyiologically possable for a perpetrator to set off
involuntary pleasure against the wishes of his victim.
A psychologist likened it to a thief stealing car keys.
He has no permission and no right to use them
but if he puts them in the ignition  it will (illegally)
start the car.

Some men get confused that they felt pleasure
some question their sexuality
some are taunted about their alleged sexuality.

Realistically its quite likely the survivor is hetrosexual
but battling flash backs which interfere with normal
normal sexual relationships with a spouce or female partner.
and / or  csa induced ssa (same sex attraction)
this is managable - for example looking away
by avoiding tempting situations
by resisting the mantras of the pro gay lobby.

Personally  I  see ones sexuality after traumatic penetrative   csa  as 
disorientated.
like concussion after a blow to the head.

(if link doesn't work use link in top bar
   or add ".htm"  or ".html"  )

Some research suggests that the brain actually grows new links al the time.

That would mean that hetrosexual male survivors can
strengthen or grow hetrosexual likns and associations.

some have spoken of csa induced ssa associations being negated, or broken
in any case unused links do decay
or it would not be necessary to revise for an exam.

more research is needed

more understanding

better councelling techniques

  The pro gay dominant school of thought are critical of
what they call "reparative thecniques"
their arguement in fundamentally flawed as they cite unwilling participants sent to church run programmes
"to be cured" of gayness.
1. most programmes fail when the participants are forced
        to do the programme.
   these critics never cite the sucess stories of those who
    chose to do the programme.

2. perhaps those developing the programmes ought to
     focus more on csa recovery
    then  activate changes in thought patterns
   
     sadly some Christian ministries focus on curing addictions
      including sexual adictions

     when they should focus on recovery from csa ministry
      
     early in my quest for recovery from csa I was informed
     that it was estimated that 80% of gays had been    sexually abused.  I would have thought that this would
motovate caring ministries to earnestly pray for pathways of recovery from csa.

sadly its avoided bu many churches
and its avoided by many councellors and psychologists

there is a fear of how we will react
as our memories surface
as we feel our pain.

but its managable

healing and recovery is possable.

only tonight I was talking to a csa survivor
who had fallen into homosexuality anf he reported
a miraculous deliverance.

Some are blessed with miricles

Some of us have slow recovery from csa

What is important is that survivors are allowed to recover in our time and our pace,
neither pressured into "getting over it"
nor slowed down by over management by councellors
       or psychologists.

any csa survivor reading this needs to have a councellor
or psychologist
and support such as survivor forums on line
and an understanding and caring Pastor

support groups are recommended if available
see the Links page

be aware that recovery has many suprises
and rocky times

some survivors isolate

please
please

whilst I have prayed and researched to provide understanding and insight which I could not find
my pages are at this stage introductory
and inconclusive

survivors must take responsability for your reactions
and to get support.


I will post more later.